My family is patriotic. We can't sing "The Star Spangled Banner" without wiping a tear from our eyes. When we see a color guard approach, we stand and salute our American flag. Veterans are our heroes and we enjoy the splendor of fireworks on the 4th of July. So, I invited my Mom to celebrate our nation's independence. It would be perfect, I thought, as I dropped into a steady gaze outside my kitchen window imagining the weekend ahead. I envisioned the hometown parade followed by an afternoon on our back patio. We'd enjoy the cool breeze and raise our glasses to the birth of the greatest country on earth! In my dream I could taste the cool cocktails and smell the freshly barbequed hotdogs. The day would be topped off with ice cream churned the old fashioned way and my girls would giggle with delight at the lyrics of "Yankee Doodle". The nearby wading pool would keep the kids entertained as my Mom and I quietly gossiped about the latest family drama. Husbands, of course, were engaged in man-stuff, i.e., keeping an eye on the pressure of the pony keg and setting up the backyard fireworks! Neighbors would arrive soon and festivities would continue through the night! Ahhhh, God Bless America! I smiled to myself as I turned to see my husband standing behind me. He had that look on his face--uh-oh, no fairy tale here!
"Babe" he began "remember I made plans to meet the guys at the lake"! "Don't worry, I'm taking the girls so that you can get ready for your Mom's visit. All the trucks are set with their schedules so there shouldn't be ANY problems. You'll have to take the 'hauling phone'-- I don't get reception out there. Don't worry--ENJOY!" Famous last words, I thought.
Rule No. 1: A Hauler's Wife is not allowed to leave her post.
"MY" plan did not include the hauling phone today. Knowing the girls would be gone and that my Mom wasn't expected to arrive before the afternoon, I RSVPd to a baby show -- at a spa! Each of my friends had chosen a treatment--facial, manicure, pedicure or massage. I chose a massage. What fun, how relaxing ... I needed this! Following our treatments, we planned to lounge in comfy robes, eat decadent finger foods, and share well-deserved time together--without husbands or kids! Now, with the phone in my hand the picture-perfect day began to dim. Quickly, I shook it off. I refused defeat! Everything would be fine. My boss said so ... Confidently, I tucked the phone in my purse and headed out before the festivities of the holiday weekend began!
I reached my destination, greeted my friends and slipped into my robe. We sipped bubbly, while listening to the new mom's ideas for names; some shared "war stories" of birth and others shared rebuilt bodies after birth and mommy hood! Gosh, this is fun, I thought ...then....bzzzzz,bzzzzbzz,bzzzzzzzz--my pocket was vibrating! I quietly excused myself and answered. I listened ... flat tire. On the roadside, now about 30 minutes behind. The driver had called the next client but just wanted to let me know. Everything in control. Check. I returned to the party and soon after was called for my massage. A bit tense, I flopped on the massage table. I breathed in deeply, closed my eyes and listened to the soft music.....the lights were dim and I began to relax under the pressure of the therapist's touch...... BzzzzzBzzzBZZZZZZ! My eyes popped wide open! Now what?! I stayed in the still, prone position and the massage continued innocently. My mind raced... What could be happening! I NEED to get the phone. I thought. BE STILL! I reprimanded myself. I heard the soft words of the therapist urging me to relax....RELAX? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF THE LIABILITY (then, forcing calmness) that is out on the road right now? Calm down...!! Everything is going to be just fine. You hire capable men, I reminded myself. I willed my shoulders to relax. BzzzzBzzBzzzBZZZZZZZ! I inhaled deeply, I exhaled with greater force. I pinched my eyes closed. Ahhh, this is NICE! What a luxury! This..IS...nice, I repeated again to myself. The therapist had found a tight spot and expertly rubbed it to submission. My fists unclenched ....relax, I coaxed myself. Silence at last, then BzzzzBzzzBzBzBzBZZZZZZ. Damn!
Time crept by and the phone continued to vibrate reminding me of waiting messages. I endured the session and when it was over I politely thanked the therapist, jumped off the table and before the door closed my phone was dialed for voice mail....WHAT, what could it be? I stood, half naked and listened intently--"Hi sis, it's Mom...we got down here early and I let myself in. Where are you guys? We brought the potato salad and ice cold watermelon. Take your time. I'll start the ice cream. We'll be in the back yard when you get here. Can't wait to see you! Bye!" I put my phone down, tipped my head back and laughed to myself ... My Mom!
Rule No. 2: A Hauler's Wife needs to relax!
